new updates of my advantures over the long weekend spent mostly with Chef.
came over to his place thursdy night, we went to bed and just slept together which was alot of fun as i cant remember the last time i've done that. went to work in the morning for the last time at that place, after work mom joined me we went to have lunch and afterwards i called Chef who invited me over to see who he rearanged his whole place. so sent mom home and went over to Chef's place. had dinner with him at his sisters place no stress at all at meeting some of the close family at all (NOT) but i handeled it well aperantly got home after picking up some stuff at my place, thought we might be going out. then later we went out came home after i've been strugling all through the evening with my doubts and my wants and resisting from all the wrong reasons, so when we finaly got to bed realy late at night had to fight with some of my deamons again bursting into tear and getting all emotinal in bed from all kind of reasons not thinking i can handel him and what he asks of me in bed and out of it, bit of a rough night emotinaly. i knew i angerd him but wasnt sure how to word my regret and sort out the misunderstanding that caused it. we talked in bed later that day and worked things out, i understand him better now i enjoy his unbelivable sex apeal that i have never met befoe a man wo was so comfortable with himself and his sexuality that his true to himself in the most honest way ther can be. a real Alfa Male. a bit scary at first to be around but a complete turn on to be around, he pulls the primal thing out of me the conection is so difrent, the way your body reacts to this being next to you, it makes you react to things in ways you didnt realise you can.
i know this all sounds realy weird but i am excepting the change and embracing this primal attraction and with a big smile on my face.. good things will come out of it they are already here.
i know that if i would have met him a few years back i'd run awat screaming, there was a part of me that wanted to that still, but i think for the first time in a long while there are actuall debates btween the voices in my head thet are actually talking to each other not always agreeing but they are talking and that is way more than useal..
never got around to pack my stuff, or move them on the weekend like i planed and i havent seen my princess in a few days but she has adopted Mother as a serogat mother for now. i hope to move her on thursdy.
i need to go get my cute butt to tel aviv.
may Bastt bless us all!
thank Bastt for the courage and strength to deal with my deamons